Use Your Words

Today my therapist asked me how I’m doing. Because, you know, that’s what therapists do. Usually I give some variation of good/not good/tired/I don’t know. Helpful, I know.

Today, I deviated. I told her I felt depressed. She looked a little surprised and asked me when it started.

Weeks ago.  It started weeks ago. I have felt like shit for at least a month.  Yet every time I’d see her, I’d give my “not good” answer and talk around the fact that I felt depressed.

Newsflash: Therapists don’t read minds. If I don’t use those words that are specifically designed to describe this crap, there is no way for her to know.

I have this problem, you see.  While I might sit here and write about bipolar and depression and anxiety and throwing around those words like its nothing, I still can’t bring myself to say them most of the time. Hell, I cringe a little on the inside when my therapist uses them.

Moral of the story?  I need to learn to use my words.

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2 Responses to Use Your Words

  1. I’m the same way- it is so easy to write how I feel through poetry-but so hard to say it out loud- you are not alone in this

  2. Totally agree. It’s easy to hop online and type how I feel to a bunch of strangers, but to admit it to someone sitting right in front of me? *cringe* Good for you for being brave enough to break through that.

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