If you want to make me mad, this is how you do it.

I realize this post could potentially make me sound cynical and bitter. Sorry not sorry. I’m enough of a big girl to realize I’m upset at my situation and jealous and oversimplifying, but that doesn’t mean I don’t get frustrated with people.

There are few things in my life that make me truly upset.

  1. People going on “kids these days” rants.  I hated it when I was one of those kids and I hate it now. People are people are people.  Suck it up and get to know them.
  2. People who make assumptions about me because I’m a skinny white girl who looks like she’s about 14 years old when I’m really 28.
  3. Actually let me rephrase that.  People who make assumptions about people.  I know I do it sometimes, but I try really hard not to do that.
  4. Someone telling me I am not capable of doing things. Just. Don’t.
  5. Putting suffering on a scale (even though I’m guilty of this one, see below)

You get the picture. But this morning as I was scrolling through facebook, I realized there is more I can add to that list.

  1. The idea that nature can cure depression and anxiety. I shouldn’t have to explain this one. If you think this is a cure all, you don’t understand mental illness.
  2.  People who only have to go through one or two tries with meds before finding something that works and then are all “medication is amazing!” Yes medication is amazing.  I’d probably be dead or in the hospital if I wasn’t on it. But for the love of God, its not that simple.  I know I’m bitter because it took me a year and side effects are a bitch. Not to mention that the “amazing medication” only makes my situation livable, I still have to put up with all the same symptoms and sometimes they are really bad even though I am able to live on my own and hold down friends and a job. I know people have a tougher time than me. But it still pisses me off.
  3. Mental illness being referred to as depression and anxiety and sometimes PTSD. And thats it.  Those are totally legit illnesses, and those people struggle just as much if not more than I do. But only talking about only those makes all the other ones seem taboo–something scary and those people are to be avoided or treated with kid gloves. And we definitely can’t talk about it. Maybe this one is all in my head, but anytime I read or hear “mental illnesses like depression or anxiety” it makes me feel like the black sheep of the mental health community.
  4. You just need a change in routine and you’ll feel better! No.  Just no.  Routine is what keeps my sanity.  Getting up at the same time everyday.  Going to bed every night by 9 o’clock. Doing the same things in the same order in the same place.  You change something up and everything gets thrown off.  Trips stress me out.
  5. The fear that people will judge me. It’s why this blog is anonymous.  It’s why when one of my friends posted one of my entries on their Facebook I did a quick inventory of our friends to see if there was any overlap.  The ones that I did know, would they be able to figure out its me? I hate that I did that.  I don’t want to have to do that. But I do it.  Because I’m afraid of people judging me and talking about me behind closed doors.  Maybe I’m just flattering myself that someone would bother to do that, but the only reason I should want to keep this quiet is because I want it to be a private thing, not because I feel I should hide it.

So there you have it.  How to upset me in 10 easy ways.

 

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