As much as I’d love to say I’ve got my shit together now, I don’t.
Anxiety is kicking my ass and for whatever reason my brain is telling me that I can’t do what I have to do at work tomorrow, never mind I’ve done it approximately 22362 times since last May. I sat on my floor crying and playing solitaire in an attempt to distract myself. Sexy, right? It didn’t work, btw.
As I travel down this unfortunately well worn road (in my world, anxiety is like the gateway drug for everything else), I’m trying to figure out what put me here in the hopes that it will stop this. And I can come up with reasons-mainly disruption of schedule, anticipated or actual– but they aren’t slowing anything down. I’m simply watching the oncoming train and waiting for it to hit me.
So I’m just going to sit here and wait and hope the storm isn’t too bad this time.