Yesterday, I found myself looking at job listings.
Wait, I love my job, right? This is the job I’ve been waiting for the past 6 years. This is the job that lets me use all those skills I’ve collected over the years. This is the job that is supposed to let me develop those skills so I can make a difference. This is the job that I’m supposed to stick with for at least 5 years so I will have the experience and stats so that I eventually can have a job that pays a little bit more.
I’ve been in this position a year and a week and here I am dreaming of a new job.
I’m restless. I always get restless. I was a year into subbing and I was restless. I felt trapped for another two years until I started grad school. I lasted one semester in grad school before I was restless and wanted out. I was frustrated for the remainder of school. My consolation was working towards this job. And now I want something different.
I want nothing more than to be in a position where I feel like I belong, where I feel like I’m challenged, and I know enough to be considered an expert. But I never want to stick around long enough to get to that point. I never seem to be able to dedicate myself to something long enough to get to that point.
I asked someone how you know when its time to leave a job the other day, and he told me that when you feel like you can’t grow in your position any more. How can I be there already? Or am I just bored?
Or is the grass simply greener on the other side?